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【TOP 50】Stephen Colbert Quotes - WhatsApp Status | Page-1

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Page 1 of 2, Showing 50 of 56 Records
Jon always said 'The Daily Show' has no political impact, ... We're going to go ahead and pick up that gauntlet and change the world! - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Jon always said 'The Daily Show' has no political impact, ... We're going to go ahead and pick up that gauntlet and change the world!

Stephen Colbert

 
In success, you wouldn't be able to say I'm conservative or liberal. I'm part of the blame-America-last crowd. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

In success, you wouldn't be able to say I'm conservative or liberal. I'm part of the blame-America-last crowd.

Stephen Colbert

 America
When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no matter what happened Tuesday. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

When the president decides something on Monday, he still believes it on Wednesday - no matter what happened Tuesday.

Stephen Colbert

 

metaphorical sloppy seconds. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

metaphorical sloppy seconds.

Stephen Colbert

 
Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They don’t know they’re being funny. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They don’t know they’re being funny.

Stephen Colbert

 Executive
Now we all know that Fidel Castro dressed up like Marilyn Monroe and gave JFK a case of syphilis so bad it eventually blew out the back of his head. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Now we all know that Fidel Castro dressed up like Marilyn Monroe and gave JFK a case of syphilis so bad it eventually blew out the back of his head.

Stephen Colbert

 

[And not a moment too soon, figures Colbert (the gifted humorist-performer, that is not the make-believe blowhard who shares the same name).] My character is self-important, poorly informed, well-intentioned, but an idiot, ... So we said, 'Let's give him a promotion.' - Stephen Colbert Quotes

[And not a moment too soon, figures Colbert (the gifted humorist-performer, that is not the make-believe blowhard who shares the same name).] My character is self-important, poorly informed, well-intentioned, but an idiot, ... So we said, 'Let's give him a promotion.'

Stephen Colbert

 Believe
Even the weather page is in a state of moral decay. What’s wrong with red, white and blue, USA Today? This rainbow weather map is just another example of the homometerological agenda. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Even the weather page is in a state of moral decay. What’s wrong with red, white and blue, USA Today? This rainbow weather map is just another example of the homometerological agenda.

Stephen Colbert

 
as natural as a gorilla beating his chest. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

as natural as a gorilla beating his chest.

Stephen Colbert

 

It was, actually. I started playing Dungeons & Dragons the first week it was introduced to the market - at least the first week it was introduced down here. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

It was, actually. I started playing Dungeons & Dragons the first week it was introduced to the market - at least the first week it was introduced down here.

Stephen Colbert

 
He's the master, ... It's admirable. I watch him with my mouth open and think, 'How does he do it?' If I could only have a scrap of that. If only I could take all filters off my mouth, it would be so great. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

He's the master, ... It's admirable. I watch him with my mouth open and think, 'How does he do it?' If I could only have a scrap of that. If only I could take all filters off my mouth, it would be so great.

Stephen Colbert

 
I know there are some polls out there saying this man has a 32% approval rating. But guys like us, we don't pay attention to the polls. We know that polls are just a collection of statistics that reflect what people are thinking in

I know there are some polls out there saying this man has a 32% approval rating. But guys like us, we don't pay attention to the polls. We know that polls are just a collection of statistics that reflect what people are thinking in "reality." And reality has a well-known liberal bias.

Stephen Colbert

 Approval
knocking up pop stars. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

knocking up pop stars.

Stephen Colbert

 
Lemme just talk to you for a second about something that I think is good for America: caramel apples, ... I had one last night. Delicious. Not talking about candy apples. I think candy apples are a danger! You crack 'em, they're very sharp. You candy apple crowd need to wake up! - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Lemme just talk to you for a second about something that I think is good for America: caramel apples, ... I had one last night. Delicious. Not talking about candy apples. I think candy apples are a danger! You crack 'em, they're very sharp. You candy apple crowd need to wake up!

Stephen Colbert

 America
The Colbert Report - Stephen Colbert Quotes

The Colbert Report

Stephen Colbert

 

Like O'Reilly, we'll grab the most important word out of every sentence, ... `The,' for example. Also, I'll say, `I'm angry,' and the graphic will read, `Colbert angry.' - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Like O'Reilly, we'll grab the most important word out of every sentence, ... `The,' for example. Also, I'll say, `I'm angry,' and the graphic will read, `Colbert angry.'

Stephen Colbert

 Example
I don't think he's necessarily a Republican or Democrat, ... He is part of the `Blame America Last' crowd. Mostly, he just wants to get those bastards -- whoever they are. They know who they are, and they know they're going to get gotten. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

I don't think he's necessarily a Republican or Democrat, ... He is part of the `Blame America Last' crowd. Mostly, he just wants to get those bastards -- whoever they are. They know who they are, and they know they're going to get gotten.

Stephen Colbert

 America
I want to thank Comedy Central for picking up the show, but more importantly I want to congratulate Comedy Central for picking up the show, - Stephen Colbert Quotes

I want to thank Comedy Central for picking up the show, but more importantly I want to congratulate Comedy Central for picking up the show,

Stephen Colbert

 Comedy
The show is about me in that when you give opinions, you're saying something about yourself, - Stephen Colbert Quotes

The show is about me in that when you give opinions, you're saying something about yourself,

Stephen Colbert

 Opinions
an attractive vessel through which the river of truth can flow. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

an attractive vessel through which the river of truth can flow.

Stephen Colbert

 Truth
They thought it was warping their children's minds. Which it might have been, but it also took a lot of creativity to play it. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

They thought it was warping their children's minds. Which it might have been, but it also took a lot of creativity to play it.

Stephen Colbert

 
I can't prove it, but I can say it. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

I can't prove it, but I can say it.

Stephen Colbert

 American Comedian Funny
In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant, ... One motto on the show is, 'Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.' - Stephen Colbert Quotes

In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant, ... One motto on the show is, 'Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.'

Stephen Colbert

 
We don't want any filter, ... The correspondent is only going to put his spin on it. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

We don't want any filter, ... The correspondent is only going to put his spin on it.

Stephen Colbert

 
So you weren't a good student. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

So you weren't a good student.

Stephen Colbert

 
I'm a big fan. I've always been a news junkie, - Stephen Colbert Quotes

I'm a big fan. I've always been a news junkie,

Stephen Colbert

 News
It's about bluster and personality, ... Daily Show. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

It's about bluster and personality, ... Daily Show.

Stephen Colbert

 Personality
His shadow is dark enough, - Stephen Colbert Quotes

His shadow is dark enough,

Stephen Colbert

 
We're going to deal with truth on my show. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

We're going to deal with truth on my show.

Stephen Colbert

 Truth
My character is self-important, poorly informed, well-intentioned but an idiot, ... So we said, `Let's give him a promotion.' - Stephen Colbert Quotes

My character is self-important, poorly informed, well-intentioned but an idiot, ... So we said, `Let's give him a promotion.'

Stephen Colbert

 Character
He's definitely the king, ... I have trouble watching his show. It's exhausting. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

He's definitely the king, ... I have trouble watching his show. It's exhausting.

Stephen Colbert

 Trouble
He had a wonderful interview with Bono during the Republican National Convention in New York. It made me think twice about Bono. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

He had a wonderful interview with Bono during the Republican National Convention in New York. It made me think twice about Bono.

Stephen Colbert

 
Bush has a real problem on his hands here, John: What honor should he bestow on Karl Rove? - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Bush has a real problem on his hands here, John: What honor should he bestow on Karl Rove?

Stephen Colbert

 Honor
He thinks very highly of himself. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

He thinks very highly of himself.

Stephen Colbert

 
He would be just as apprehensive as I was, before the first film came out. Really, really, really hoping - excited, obviously - but really, really hoping that they don't blow it. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

He would be just as apprehensive as I was, before the first film came out. Really, really, really hoping - excited, obviously - but really, really hoping that they don't blow it.

Stephen Colbert

 
And I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled in poetry. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

And I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled in poetry.

Stephen Colbert

 Poetry
Every day, if I could find someone to play with me. If I couldn't find someone to play with me, I would work on my player character. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Every day, if I could find someone to play with me. If I couldn't find someone to play with me, I would work on my player character.

Stephen Colbert

 
Stephen Debates 21-Year-Old Self. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Stephen Debates 21-Year-Old Self.

Stephen Colbert

 Self
These shows are the demon children of the 24-hour cable-news cycle, - Stephen Colbert Quotes

These shows are the demon children of the 24-hour cable-news cycle,

Stephen Colbert

 Children
My character is not based on (Bill) O'Reilly, ... It's the same guy from The Daily Show. You'd never say it's O'Reilly. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

My character is not based on (Bill) O'Reilly, ... It's the same guy from The Daily Show. You'd never say it's O'Reilly.

Stephen Colbert

 Character
Would I kill for that neck, ... Geraldo gives you a sense of mission. He seems to change the world with every story. I love the ego. You put those two together, you get this sexy package of manliness and mission. I just love it. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Would I kill for that neck, ... Geraldo gives you a sense of mission. He seems to change the world with every story. I love the ego. You put those two together, you get this sexy package of manliness and mission. I just love it.

Stephen Colbert

 
They're all cult of personality, ... People don't come there for news. They come there for that guy's take on it. It's an editorial. Aaron Brown loves the sound of his voice. He sucks the flavor out of every sentence. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

They're all cult of personality, ... People don't come there for news. They come there for that guy's take on it. It's an editorial. Aaron Brown loves the sound of his voice. He sucks the flavor out of every sentence.

Stephen Colbert

 News
As God said to Job, Checkmate - Stephen Colbert Quotes

As God said to Job, Checkmate

Stephen Colbert

 God
Jon's his own guy, but it's a gig that says a lot about who you are in the comedy community. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Jon's his own guy, but it's a gig that says a lot about who you are in the comedy community.

Stephen Colbert

 Comedy
Smoking pot ... thanks for putting down the pipe and talking to me. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Smoking pot ... thanks for putting down the pipe and talking to me.

Stephen Colbert

 Smoking
Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Just put 'em through a spell check and go home. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Just put 'em through a spell check and go home.

Stephen Colbert

 People
The greatest thing about this man is he's steady. You know where he stands. He believes the same thing Wednesday that he believed on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday. Events can change; this man's beliefs never will. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

The greatest thing about this man is he's steady. You know where he stands. He believes the same thing Wednesday that he believed on Monday, no matter what happened Tuesday. Events can change; this man's beliefs never will.

Stephen Colbert

 Man
Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts are. What feels like the right answer as opposed to what reality will support. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts are. What feels like the right answer as opposed to what reality will support.

Stephen Colbert

 
Twenty-two astronauts were born in Ohio. What is it about your state that makes people want to flee the earth? - Stephen Colbert Quotes

Twenty-two astronauts were born in Ohio. What is it about your state that makes people want to flee the earth?

Stephen Colbert

 People
People are constantly saying, 'How's it feel to have such an impact?' I just want to be funny. I'm a comedian, not a political thinker. We're changing the world one factual error at a time. - Stephen Colbert Quotes

People are constantly saying, 'How's it feel to have such an impact?' I just want to be funny. I'm a comedian, not a political thinker. We're changing the world one factual error at a time.

Stephen Colbert

 Funny
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